Diary 6/23/22: “Kayfabe” again; dream email; inspirational quotes; Weltschmerz; happy pills; the end; suspicious charge; happy ending.
Copyright 2022 (text only) by Alan Carl Nicoll
All Rights Reserved
On 5/22 I wrote: “The word ‘kayfabe’ is discussed here; an inadequate synonym would be ‘fake.’” I included the link. This morning I tried the link and saw this in response:
Trying the link a second time produced the same result. Can it be that “kayfabe” is a fake word? No. Going back to the link just now revealed the page that indeed “was there all the time”! Come on, world, it’s 5:21 am, I don’t need this right now.
Indeed, I am a bit upset (I’ve been out of bed for an hour). I had a dream that I’d gotten an email response to my complaint to RexMD which was completely nonsensical and I woke thinking that perhaps the website is an out-and-out ripoff which is designed only to loot your bank account and disappear before the Feds close in. I was thinking along the lines of getting my bank to change my account information to prevent subsequent “looting.”
One of the likes I got yesterday was from a website that has over 4,000 followers. As usually happens when an unfamiliar someone pops up on my blog, I clicked on their link to see who they are. This particular blog is like many others I’ve seen: daily “inspirational quotes.” Are people so desperate for daily hope that they follow such useless blogs?
Well, why shouldn’t they be? In the United States, we are tricked, lied to, misinformed, and otherwise manipulated into being laborers for the “morbidly wealthy” so that they can accumulate more wealth. I used to call my blog “The End is Near” and I’ve never lost that belief; today my outlook is as bleak as it’s ever been about the state of the world. The German word, “Weltschmerz,” or world-pain, puts it concisely.
It doesn’t help that last night I watched the first twenty minutes of a documentary on Link TV about psychiatric diagnoses and the ever-worsening situation of “the diagnosed.” The gist was that the shrink who prescribes a “happy pill” because you’re feeling down is not your friend, and the pill might well make your original problem worse (eventually). At first you feel better, and there’s the insidious part. It’s like the auto mechanic who first provides great service at a cheap price, building your trust, only to string you along later while ripping you off. What’s really sad is that the psychiatrist is also “tricked, lied to, misinformed,” etc., by the pharmaceutical companies, while she just wants to help but has little in her toolbox that’s reliable.
I exaggerate the picture, and maybe, just maybe, that documentary also tricked me, lied to me, misinformed me… So I’m sitting here and my head is whirling at this monstrous image of wheels-within-wheels of tricks, lies, misinformation and all I want is to make it stop.
I don’t, however, reach for a happy pill. Instead, I’ll have breakfast, turn on Family Guy, and work sudoku puzzles during the commercials, numbing my troubled heart while pissing away my “golden years,” because what is the sensible alternative when you see reality crumbling around you and seven billion evolved apes racing toward the cliff?
Makes me wish I could draw a cartoon to capture the essence of this morning’s thoughts, if they can be called that.
There is a certain perverse satisfaction in feeling depressed about the end of the world while others are clinging to their “false” hopes. “Gee, I was smart enough to see it coming.” Put this way, it looks like stupidity.
This “end” is not going to be an apocalypse; rather, it’s a forest fire here, a drought and famine there, a catastrophic flood or hurricane in the other place, a species extinction everyplace—sort of a “death of a thousand cuts” on a global scale. That is, no apocalypse unless the nations that have the nukes decide to “nuke it out,” which they might stumble into over the Ukraine conflict. That would be quicker, but no less unpleasant.
Sadly, this whining is doing nothing toward preventing the end; I’m like the coward on the runaway train who just makes everyone’s last moments worse by running around screaming and pissing his pants. Except that I’m not even that amusing. Okay, I’ll shut up for now.
Have I become the clichéd crabby old white man? I can’t deny it, and all my most cherished opinions might just be my own pessimism and cynicism spoiling my old age. After all, we’ve had nefarious repugliKKKans at least since Richard Milhouse Nixon (he resigned 8/8/74) and predictions of doom I suppose since Plato. The atom bomb was “supposed to” destroy the world in the fifties, or the sixties, or any time since then. We’re sitting on a mountain of dynamite as we play with matches. But in fact the nukes kept us from additional catastrophic world wars, so instead the imperial powers (there are one or two) are strangling most of the world to enrich themselves. Thoreau wrote of greedy farmers who could look on his beloved swamp and see only dollars; he didn’t say that people would look on suffering people and see only dollars, though he was well aware of the slavery right under his nose (he died in 1862).
Received a text from my bank asking me to verify a suspicious charge to my debit card. It was over $1,300 to some place or account I’d never heard of, and apparently it was declined, so I replied that the charge was incorrect. My card was quickly blocked and now I’m sixth in the phone queue to get a new card. This is encouraging, as I was worried about possible future ripoffs because of the RexMD business mentioned above. In fact, I had checked my account information already this morning and seen that no further charges had been taken.
If I were half as smart as I think I am, I would have called my credit union as soon as I saw that second charge from RexMD—or, indeed, never dealt with them in the first place. Buying sildenafil online to work around my doctor’s restriction was an act of desperation and an admission of weakness. The sadder-but-wiser conclusion is that I should have dealt with my new sexual frustration by other means. It seems that I am indeed an American, wanting a “miracle pill” to solve my problem this instant, even at the risk of my health and/or life.
This is the second time I’ve been scammed in the past twelve months or so; actually, the first was unsuccessful, but it did cause me some unnecessary trouble—I bought two $500 gift cards to Nordstrom, but wised up at the last moment and got a full refund from Nordstrom. (Whew!) I may be out the $102 that was charged to my account, but at least the $1,300 fraud was declined because it was “suspicious.”
Soon, however, I got a text from my credit union, saying “Fraud alert” and “we noticed suspicious activity on your Visa Debit Card,” etc., and asking if I wanted to verify recent charges. Of course I said yes, and was asked to verify a charge of $1386.99, which had been declined. I verified that it was not legitimate. I then was informed that they had blocked by debit card and I should call an 800 number to get a new one.
I called the number and had a long conversation with a guy who was very helpful. After that I went to my local office, got a new card and a new account number, new checks, and so on. In about twenty minutes I was out the door again, the $102.00 would be returned to my account, and so on.
Happy ending, but I have about a dozen accounts that need to be updated to allow my bills to continue to be paid by automatic withdrawals.
Copyright 2022 (text only) by Alan Carl Nicoll
All Rights Reserved