2020: The Worst Year of My Life

My worst year started with a bang, literally. I was downtown for a meeting in the morning and walking toward Dagny’s when I saw a well-built black man running along 20th Street in my direction.  I paused to let him pass, but he didn’t run past—instead, he punched me in the face while speaking loudly...

Classical Music We’ll Never Hear

Somebody took a look at this, reminding me to reblog it. Funny, for the right audience.

The End is Near

This is something I wrote on my long vacation (i.e., in prison). Puns, mostly terrible, presented without apology, excuse, or explanation.

Beethoven’s Diminished Fifth. The Postman Always Sings Twice. The Finished Unsymphony. Death and the Hoyden. Mahler’s Symphony of a Thousand (Hours). Songs for Dead Earthworms. Boris Not Quite Godunov. Khovanshchina? Gesundheit! That Grand Canyon Thing with the Donkey. The Maid with the Flaxen Pubic Hair. The Belly-up Cathedral. La Merd. Don Juanovanni. Aïda Bagel with Lox. Des Knöbben Flügelhorn. Für IOUs. The Moonshine Sonata. Pollyachoo! La Boohoo. Tosca Ninny. Tostada and Fugue in the Diner. Wig on Bald Noggin. The Cohonescracker. Trouble in Trenton. Bachianas Baltimoras. Les Qualuudes. The Hungarian Raspodie. The Planetoids. The Door Knockers of Rome by Ottava Rimo Spaghetti. Ein Heldentenor. Siegfried’s Forging a Czech. Götterdämnitall. Terrace Bulbous. The Flying Little Dutch Boy. Mother Goose and Lohen Grimm. Tannsalon. Carnival Funeral March. William Won’t Tell. Iphigenia…

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